11/22/12

Maine Court Ruling Denies 5th Grade Trans Student Her Right To Life

Transgender 5th Grader's Ostracizing Saddens Dad, could have ruined his daughter but delights the School's Lawyer.

RSU 26 attorney Melissa Hewey says the school was doing everything in its power to help the child, and meet the needs of the other children at the school. She is happy the judge agreed.
"That's the part of the decision that my clients and I are particularly pleased about," Hewey said. "Because from our perspective the school went above and beyond to try to help this child and to try to help the family, and to be accused of doing something less was really hard on my clients, and it was really a good feeling to have the judge vindicate them." - WCSH Portland
Was I so horrible?
I can tell you from my own experience how cruel and dangerous a school can become when as an adult I was restricted to using the facility bathroom. As part of my transitioning plan in 2007 I enrolled in a medical school but was devastated after being misgendered constantly by the instructors. So I complained, and within days seemingly out of retribution, I was told I could no longer use the women's room by the administration.
That public accommodations denial did nothing to abate the harassment, only made it worst. Instructors and students emboldened by the administrations decision continued to misgender me and when I was out of earshot of others they started whispering threats, tripping me and poking me hard in the back mimicking knife attacks in the hallways.
This makes me sick. This woman is portraying the adult oppressors as victims? What of the Child's life for crying out loud? I think the supreme court ought to seriously consider whether the school's administrators should retain there jobs. I ended up quiting the school, remained un and underemployed to this day working as a cashier and in warehouses. I pray justice will be served for this Maine student and her family. She deserves the life transphobia denied me. Full story at WCSH 6

TDOR Dear Prudence Question: "He to She" A Transitioning Husband

Originaly posted in Slate titled
"He Becomes Her" on Novemeber 20th by Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is on Washington Post weekly to chat live with readers. An edited transcript of that chat is below. (Send questions to Prudence at  prudence@slate.com.)


Q. Transgendered Husband: I believe transgendered people should be treated with the same respect and imbued with the same rights as cisgendered people. I have always felt this way, and I have several transgendered friends. Then my husband, whom I love very much, told me he wants to become a woman—or, she has always felt like a woman trapped in a man's body, and if she doesn't begin transitioning, she will be emotionally crippled. Initially, I promised to remain married to her during her transition and for some time afterward, to give our marriage a chance to adjust to her transition and sex change. It has been three months, and as much as I love my husband, I am miserable. To a certain extent, my love for my husband is rooted in his manhood. The more my husband transitions into becoming a woman, the less romantic love I feel for her. I just don't think I can remain her wife. I am heartbroken and feel as though I am a widow, which sounds so dramatic. My husband is emotionally fragile right now, because she's lost some important people to her because of her transition. Everyone commends me for supporting her and sticking with our marriage, so I feel like a fraud now too. She loves me so much; I cannot imagine how to tell her I want a divorce, that she has lost me because she is transgendered. Or is it better to be a bad person and leave? And yes, I am seeing a counselor.

A: Of course people change and grow during the course of a marriage. Marriage would be stiflingly dull if that wasn't the case. But if your husband confesses to you he plans to start growing breasts, he has so materially changed the contract of your marriage that I completely understand that you feel the husband you knew has died. In a way, he has and is being reborn as someone new, and you are not obligated to stay in the marriage under those circumstances. People would not expect you to stay (and you probably wouldn't) if he said he realized he was gay, or he wanted to enter into a polygamous relationship. This feeling he is a woman trapped in a man's body is not a new discovery for him, and he withheld absolutely crucial information from you prior to your marriage. It's great that you still love him and want to be an emotional support for him. But you must be emotionally fragile too, and there is nothing wrong with your realizing your husband's change of life requires you to make your own.

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I thought this was a very enlightened question and response, for the most part. But sadly where I saw it posted on the web there was no option to comment available. Many in community have begun transition while in a relationship. I would love to hear you. What's your thoughts about this Q and A.